Illinois Valley News

I have been the director in Cave Junction for 13 years now and have enjoyed seeing the children of our valley grow into young adults. There have been many highs and a few lows during my career with the club. Some of my favorite experiences involve the simple moments with the kids every day after school. Of course, as any youth development professional will attest, there are challenging times as well.

Interestingly, some of the most challenging moments have been with the adults, not with the children. Organizations, like the Boys & Girls Club, and youth sports leagues, such as soccer or Little League, depend on adult volunteers in order to run their programs.

We, along with these leagues and organizations, serve thousands of kids each year and appreciate the tremendous input that positive adult role-models have in the lives of the youth of our communities. Each year, it never fails that most of the difficult issues that arise are not due to the behavior of the kids, rather due to the behavior of the adults.

This year was no exception. During our most recent football season there were concerns at some games that parents and coaches were yelling at kids using crude language. I am happy to report that all of the issues have been resolved satisfactorily, and that we moved into the basketball season on a positive and proactive note.

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When there is conflict, miscommunication or disruptive behavior by adults, this unfortunately, can have a negative effect on our kids and the program they are involved in. Volunteers and coaches are the backbone of youth sports and nonprofit organizations in America.  Without the thousands of parents signing up to coach every season, the youth sports world would come to a screeching halt.

We cannot express enough our appreciation to the dozens of coaches/parents who volunteer each season, year after year. Each year, we screen the volunteers and work to determine how they will be a good fit for the program. Are they a former athlete trying to relive their sports experiences? Are they a parent of a reluctant youth trying to give their child the same great experience that they had as a child?

Or are they the mother or father of a child who was told, “If you don’t volunteer, we don’t have enough coaches and won’t have a team!” Do they want to provide a safe, positive environment for the kids? And, are they a good representative for the organization?

At the club, we screen volunteer applications to ensure that all coaches and parents interested in helping are going to be a good fit for our mission. Not only do we conduct criminal background checks, we also take into consideration other factors required to be a good volunteer.

We consider whether the adult is going to represent the club in a professional manner and whether they are going to serve as an advocate, supporter and ally of the programs. We also require that all parents and coaches sign and commit to a Code of Conduct which outlines what is expected and includes acceptable and unacceptable behavior.

If we do not feel an applicant will be a good coach or volunteer and that the applicant will not act as advocate and support of the program, their application to volunteer will be rejected. The safety of the kids is our primary concern, as well as providing a positive, quality program for the community.

Nearly 250 youth in Illinois Valley participate in club activities each year. More than 25 parents volunteer each year as well. These parent-volunteers play an important role for setting the standard for behavior with the children. It is critical that parents understand their responsibility as role models. Being the parent of a youngster involved in organized sports takes effort, commitment, and a healthy dose of patience.

It also means shuttling your child back and forth to practices and attending games – but that’s just the beginning.

Kids will mirror the behavior of their adult role models. In sports, players take on the demeanor of their coaches and parents. When parents and coaches are positive, when they give players encouragement, and when they help them to understand that having fun is more important than winning, the kids have a great experience.

But when parents yell at officials and players, their children will mirror the behavior and behave the same way.

Sports parents have a big effect on young superstars. A healthy and successful sports experience will depend on all parents’ ability to instill confidence and self-esteem in their child. As we are about to tip off the basketball season, here are just a few tips for parents and adults to help children have an enjoyable and positive season:

During practices and before games:

• Learn the rules of the sport.
• Make sure your child attends all practices.
• Clearly communicate your sportsmanship expectations to your child.
• Help to create a positive and fun environment for all kids.

At games:

• Attend each game and arrive on time.
• Discourage players and others from making negative comments or using profanity.
• Help to create a positive and fun environment for all kids.

After games:

• Avoid making any negative comments about coaches, players or officials, especially in front of your child.
• Be encouraging and congratulate players from both teams regardless of the score.
• Sincerely thank the coaches and referees for volunteering their time and talents.
• Address any of your child’s poor sportsmanship issues in private, in a moderate tone of voice.
• Help to create a positive and fun environment for all kids.

Children who have a positive experience in sports achieve better grades, and are less likely to engage in dangerous behavior. They live longer and healthier lives due to the improved fitness they carry forward from youth sports. Sports provide the ideal “virtual classroom” for teaching life lessons, and this depends on coaches and parents.

Randy Keith, our Program/Athletic director at the Boys & Girls Club here in Cave Junction, shared with me that in his eight years of coaching experience (varsity football at Illinois Valley High School) he has been blessed to work a wide variety of coaching-styles.

He indicated that “although they all had their own views and opinions on the game itself, they believe they would agree that student athletes take everyday life skills from the game. The best coaches develop good young men first and good athletes second.”

Mark Higgins, the athletic director at I.V. High School, considers sportsmanship and respect as some of the most important qualities a student can have as they enter high school sports. Higgins shared that players must have “respect for the game, your opponents, the officials, spectators, coaches, and maybe most importantly respect for oneself.”

He stressed that negativity and disrespect (from parents or youth) have no room in matters of representing the school, our community, and our young competitors. 

From the entry-level play at the Boys & Girls Club to the competitive high school level, earning a spot on a team is not a right, it is a privilege earned by those showing positive behavior, teamwork, dedication, respect and support. These characteristics are learned early in a player’s life from the parents and volunteer coaches around them.

The bottom line is that at the end of the day, the club and the schools are charged with creating good citizens. This is a noble mission that we all take quite seriously. We care deeply for our students and that is why promoting positive sportsmanship (from parents and coaches as well) is essential to our programs and to the lives of the children we serve.

(All photos: Illinois Valley News file)

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