From our weekly issue dated September 3, 2008

Flint Eastwood, Bubba Bigfoot and Jellirabbit

Our lives would be so boring without kittens and cats. We wouldn’t have tiny scratches on our hands, arms, feet and ankles; and we would have to worry about having too much money, instead of spending it on cat food, cat treats, kitty toys and veterinarian bills.

We could sleep all night without being awakened by one cat or another wanting some affection, maybe some ear-scratching or chin-chucking. It’s a treat to awaken suddenly with a cat nose in your nose. There would be no kitty litter underfoot, and no delightful aromas from the litter boxes. (Having four house cats demands two).

Cute but still nameless

We would miss out on the odd, piercing noises that cats sometimes make, especially late at night or real early in the morning. If we didn’t have cats they wouldn’t be underfoot; they wouldn’t try to snag our food; they wouldn’t decorate the house with cat hair, hair balls, or trail markers on furniture caused by kitty claws.

We would cease to be entertained by their antics as they race through the house, this way and that way. We’d miss them staring through our windows, tracking birds and making predator noises. Lack of their playfulness would leave a hole in our lives.

God made cats so darn attractively cute and elegant and entertaining because otherwise we might toss them outside. Not going to happen; they’re just too cool.