From our weekly issue dated March 12, 2008

We recently had two new temporary houseguests, one of whom bit my right index finger and drew blood. I was holding his tiny tail at the time while trying to transfer him from the bathroom sink to the bathtub while Jan cleaned up their mousey dung. When I picked him up, he squeaked at the indignity and used his incisors to inflict a teeny wound.

After contacting a renowned physician who deals in potential diseases related to mice, I felt better. And at this writing, I’m still in excellent health. In fact, the doctor told me that I have the body of a 25-year-old. (A 25-year-old Chevy).

I said that our two rodent buddies should be named Harry and David, but Jan renamed them Harriet and David after a short physical exam. She also called them Pinky and Stinky, but those names were only in passing.

The meese were obtained because it was thought by one of us that our two house cats needed some … er … entertainment. And Jellirabbit and Flint Eastwood were entertained. But that was as far as they would take it. Yes, they liked watching the little white critters scurry about the bathtub. Yes, they thoroughly enjoyed the company. In fact, at one point Flinty picked up each of the mice in turn, sort of tasted them, and then spit them out. And he and Jelli seemed to be thrilled by staring at Harriet and David.

In fact, they got a big kick out of being in the bathtub with the mice. They became friends of a sort, although the cats were a bit jumpy when the newcomers trod on their tails.

Once we realized that our kitties no longer are as ferocious as they’d led us to believe, we decided that we really did not want to add the mice to our home zoo. So after a few days of searching, we found someone who wanted them, and off they went to yet another residence.

Frankly, we humans even got a bit attached to the little guys. But boy, they are dumb; not even smart enough to be scared of Big Bad Cats. Still, they’re cute with their beady red eyes, little claw paws, and wiggly rodent tails. And that’s the end of this tale.